For Whom the Bell Toll

"What are they smoking at Bell?"

Well, many of us have to ask about the "toll" we've paid Ma Bell. Here is the abridged version of my own Bell Sympatico odyssey.

---A few months ago I could no longer upload changes to "The Isle of Nod"

(which is why it hasn't been updated in so long...)

---I called and got patched through...eventually...to India where they said they'd change my password to reinitialize. Didn't work.

---I called again. After more stretches of hold listening to Gershwin Muzak, they said maybe my account was in default. They patched me back to Canada (I think). They then patched me back to India when they realized I was all paid up. They said I could have an upgraded modem, though, for FREE (Who knows when I was eligible for that) and would send one. Besides that, there was nothing they could do - the problem was at my end.

---I downloaded new FTP software (to 'file transfer') - 2 different versions. I tried every combination of passwords, etc. I could think of. Well, being a borderline Ludite (and I'm thinking of going full bore soon!) I assumed it was my fault for being so stupid.

---I called Bob the computer guy, paid him. He said I was doing everything fine and the problem was there's. We called their 24 hour help line - to find that is only 24 hrs if you pay more per month. (Even though they advertise that, I guess it's the 'small print'.) Since he has a day job (computers), I'm on my own again.

---I phone the tech help line again. I forgot to mention, but they read off of one of those dreaded "scripts" that don't allow them to actually do any thinking. Every time I've called about this I've had their caution - printed on the internet, too - that they don't support your web applications, they just provide the space. I can probably recite the paragraph they read you by now. The guy in India said I needed the new modem. I told they had ordered one for me a month ago but it hadn't arrived. He said no one had sent one. BUT when it arrives, all will be well again. BUT I'll have to PAY for it. I complain and he says to wait and see if they bill me(?).

---I hook up the modem when it finally comes. Internet all works. I STILL cannot upload to my webspace.

---I call the help line, having taken a day off work to take care of this during their business hours. I'm patched through to India once again. All of the operators in India have been very polite and apologetic so far. This one is snippy. She reads me the "we don't support your problems running your website" paragraph at least four times. I try to explain the problem to her - I can't access it on their end; it's their problem!!! I ask to speak to someone higher up who can help. She reads the paragraph again. Ugh! I ask to speak to her supervisor. After more lovely muzak listening, she comes back on and says my password isn't working. Duh!? She then says we'll change it and that will fix it. I've heard that tune before, but I go with it. She changes it and it still doesn't work. FINALLY someone there believes me. After more time on hold, she says there is a problem at her end. DUH!!! It will be fixed in 48 hours. I ask if someone will email to notified when it is fixed? No. But they'll fix it.

---FINALLY they fixed it.

THE ISLE OF NOD LIVES AGAIN!!!

(www3.sympatico.ca/donfeatherstone)

I'm wondering if I should send them some of the above, plus a bill for the hours of time - not to mention the computer technician's - that their inept line of service has cost me. Maybe I should send them a "toll".
But guess what just arrived in the mail - a Bell customer satisfaction survey!!! I never fill those out, but this time...

Rant out.
Nod